I oft say ("oft" ha!) that I am both cursed and blessed being so inherently (I believe) optimistic. I don't know where it stems from and when people ask me for inspiration so they too can share in this energy, I can only reply with a mediocre "I don't know. I just am."
Although I feel it comes so naturally to me, I also work on it. I guess the only "tip" I would really encourage people to follow is taking time for yourself. I don't simply mean surface-time either, like going shopping alone, the movies (which I highly recommend) or getting a table for one. I mean really sitting down with yourself and realizing what an amazing FORCE you can truly be to whatever capacity you want. It's really that simple. No need to foresee too many years ahead, it's little steps that will make HUGE strides for your self-esteem and the rest will follow. A very cheesy, but sweet movie to take example from is when in Garden State, Natalie Portman's character tells Zach Braff she makes a noise or does something no one has ever done before, when she's feeling unoriginal.
I am also not scared to admit at times the positive, happy persona acts as a cover up. It makes you less vulnerable to others. I've posted extremely personal, and emotional blogs before so you know I haven't an immunity to sadness or anger. I am human, duh! I also think that people on the pessimistic end of the spectrum (that I believe we share) use their energy as a cover up also. What better way to avoid emotional pain than to prepare yourself mentally? It's a "brace yourself" attitude.
A good friend of mine used to call me the Eternal Optimist as defined by Soren Kiekergaard. A lot of our debates were over his opinion that optimists do not have thoughts based in reality, so that positivism does not take into account any possibility for negative outcome. My argument was that we maintain awareness of negative possibility but this then becomes another way to create or find the desired goal. In simpler terms someone might say I am an "ignorance is bliss" supporter but I disagree with that phrase and do not keep such a philosophy being an optimist! Actually, being an artist, I love feeling every emotion so I really want to experience it all: good, bad, ugly, whatevs, GIVE IT TO ME!
Dang! Why did I just get so intense? Oh, because I bought Psychology Today magazine I think for the first time in my life. I've always perused issues but then settled for a less thought provoking Glamour. Anyway, I decided to buy this time because December's cover read:
OPTIMISM: How to Tap it, When to wield it...or withhold it.
After reading their article on new studies of both STRATEGIC optimism and pessimism - yes it's necessary - I am only feeling more comfortable in the person I am. I am a dreamer - an optimistic trait - and I don't always base my faith in positive outcomes in reality but in this way optimists motivate themselves. On the other hand, pessimists use an opposite approach, focusing on the possibility of negative, only to achieve the same goals. Also, to be clear, a pessimist does not mean you are an Eeyore among Winnie the Poohs, but you find a different motivation to force yourself into action. I myself have made it very clear that when I am feeling anxious I bite my nails, procrastinate and usually waste money that I barely have. A true pessimist, uses his anxieties to move in a different direction. The simple message is that no matter which "side" (which there shouldn't be sides because both Os and Ps are a tools of force for any individual) as long as your approach to achieving your goal is without hurting yourself or others (be it mentally, physically, emotionally) it is safe to say you will be a successful, healthy person. But for the record I don't mind smiling most of the time, telling bad jokes, appearing as a careless slacker because I know, in the end, I'm gonna be right where I want to be! *Zing to you serious, boring, business people out there haha!
So more about me. I've been feeling REALLY good about my body lately. I don't know why though. I haven't been eating that well, haven't performed in over a week, and I haven't made the sex in sometime. BUT I did have my shoot this Saturday with Moz Foto and am THRILLED about the teaser picture she has posted. I'm dying on the inside. Not on the outside because we must remain modest & humble as to not jinx it. HA! Here is the picture if you haven't seen it on my Facebook or Twitter! I'm obsessed. I'm also curious to see what my Mom thinks *bites nails*
I did my own makeup and hair because our awesome location was on a short time frame. My eyes came out great. I did em much smokier than on any other shoot and I love the outcome. We kept lips more on the nude side. All color products were MAC: Eyeshadow: Carbonized (limited edition that I highly recommend, sold out online!), Lips: Soar Lip Pencil and Pink Plaid Matte Lipstick (a fave for years now, I switch up the liner underneath and it changes the lipstick), Lashes: my $1.99 top-secret no-name special. As for complexion I am obsessed with Lancome's Teint Idole and Korres' concealer. Brushes are from Sephora Platinum/Airbrush collection. They will change your makeup application for life. Just sayin.
Woohooo - success!
Damnit I had something funny to end this post with and now I forget. I should have written it down! I'm trying to do that more. Whenever I have any good ideas or jokes I MUST jot them down or type them into my phone. My brain is in overdrive right now because I might have a MANHATTAN venue interested in having a show. That's all I'm saying.
Thanks again for reading, have a wonderful week, it's almost Thanksgiving! Although I almost forgot about it because there's Christmas shit everywhere.
Ciao for now,
PS: I made myself fans!! They're not done yet so I won't post a picture yet. But the plan is to use them in my holiday shows that I'm doing with The Glamazons! More info to come!