I hadn't been brought to tears by this guy in awhile. I've been good with keepin my mind moving forward and letting the past stay in the past. Seeing him recently just seemed to break me. It also stemmed from a really beautiful (which I didn't tell her it was beautiful, but it was) conversation I had with my girl LP. I found it sad while also cleansing.
We got into a discussion about how some people decide to settle into a life that does not challenge them. It doesn't move them. It doesn't inspire them. I know some of you will ask "well, how do you know? who do you think you are to assume such a thing?" I too was and still am a bit skeptical to accept it happens, but I'm sure it does. I wanna believe it's impossible. I wanna believe that I am not the only one who refuses to live a mediocre life no matter how long I get to be alive. Mediocre is also subjective, I just want people to know they deserve happiness and deep love.
I sit writing this with tears in my eyes. I think I just miss him. As a friend. As anything. As a constant.
Ciao for now,