Well these emotions aren’t gonna eat themselves!

Ugh, so typical while I’m over here crying and getting chunkier than I’d like, I’m sure he’s out on town after hours having a blast (although drinking his emotions and growing his own belly). He will have no trouble finding someone to bide his time with and she will not be lack luster. She will be clueless, and faithful and eventually hurt, but unfortunately that doesn't make me feel better. I want her to be me. I was really into this guy. I don't think it'll ever work out in the end but who knows! For now I'm just really really really bummed out about it and it's affecting me physically.

That said, how the fuck do you find the motivation to be physically fit? I know the experience is different for everyone but I have NEVER been one to head to the gym or take up jogging or anything exercise related on a regular schedule. When the weather is nice it definitely kick starts my mood (naturally), but even that fizzles. I also have a desk job working against me. Ideally, because I don't have to be here so early, I'd wake up earlier and get my heart rate going for even a bit. Starting is always the hardest part...

Have very few shows booked and that's usually definitive of how I'm feeling off the stage unfortunately. Coming up is Halloween night in Staten Island which is always a blast.

I hope you're all fairing well, sorry to be such a bummer...

Ciao for now,

TT